Yesterday I found out a friend of mine has died. I wish I could write that we were very good friends, because that’s just how great of a person he is, but the truth is, if he had kept a list of his top 100 friends, I highly doubt I would be on it. And yet he had a huge impact on my life.
He probably never knew that, because I never told him, and for that I am incredibly sad, but you don’t normally go up to people and say, ” Hey, remember when we talked about the weird hippy on PBS who paints the ‘Happy Clouds’? That really meant a lot to me, because at that time, I was going through some stuff with my family, and didn’t really have any friends, because I had just got back from Mexico, and my old friends and I were all in different places in our lives. So having you, one of the older guys from my high school, not only remember me, but also come up and have a conversation that lasted over a minute meant a lot. So thanks for that.” Those aren’t really normal or ok conversations to have with someone who you’re only sort of friends with, unless you like restraining orders. So he probably didn’t know that those little, silly and pointless conversations meant anything to me. To be perfectly honest, I don’t think I fully realized it until I heard he was gone.
Now, I don’t write about this to make you feel sad for his passing, though it very much is, or sad for me for my lack of friendships, but for you to realize what an impact you have on the lives of people around you. People always say that you never know who is watching you, to the point where it gets hard to believe, but it’s true. A dumb conversation about painting made me feel like I would have friends again, that life would be happy once more, that I could survive whatever the cancer threw at us. It was small and pointless, but it changed me and helped me.
You never know how much it will mean to someone for you to notice them, talk with them, just remember and acknowledge them. It costs you nothing, and yet it can mean the world to that person. So when you notice someone looks nice, or did some thing cool, or went somewhere different, take the time to say something.
And when someone makes a positive difference in your life, let them know, in the least creepy way you can. And those that make a negative one? Just brush it off and move on. There is so much more to this short, sweet life than holding on to grudges and negativity.
Aaron, I wish I had thanked you for taking some time out of your life to notice me while I still had the chance. I can’t wait to see you again. Lauren
Thank you all for reading. You all make a difference in my life, and I sincerely thank you for it, from the bottom of my heart.
